Wednesday, March 14, 2012

Spring Cleaning

Good Gods! 
My witch is “Blessing” the house again!  She calls it “Spring Cleaning”.  Correct me if I’m wrong but….Didn’t we do this LAST year?

This time it involved (among the usual horrifying activities)  spreading sticky wax on the wood floors and scrubbing kitchen walls with buckets of cleaning potion that are large enough to sacrifice a cat in… namely Yours Truly!

I made myself scarce.

The fish in the pond outside amused me for a while until a rustle in the boxwood hedges distracted me. 
For those of you who are ignorant in Feline Anatomy:  my ears are ingeniously fashioned by the Gods in a manner that funnels sound and allows me to calculate the exact trajectory of an interesting noise. 
Fearlessly and without hesitation, I pounced!  

The resulting battle was of epic proportions!   (Okay, admittedly it was a very young gopher and the fight only lasted a minute, but it would have been big and mean in a few weeks and, ultimately, I won!  That's all that counts.)

I’ve often heard my witch complain of gophers ravaging her garden, so I proudly laid the result of my “Garden Spring Cleaning” on the door mat.  I also concluded  that I’d saved her trip to the grocery store. Was it unreasonable of me to expect her to shower me with praise and tuna?

However, when she stepped out the front door to call me in, the look on her face was anything BUT grateful!
I don't understand.  After all, I was only helping…


  1. Lots of humans are just too picky, sweetie. Give them some slack. They aren't nearly as sensible as cats.

  2. Hi, my name is Bella and I am a stripey, gray long haired cat. Let me assure you that soon your owner (though how she is your owner and not the other way round I don't know) will come around eventually. They take some training.

  3. well, it's about time we heard from you! I was beginning to wonder...I think the gopher offering was a WONDERFUL present!

  4. Awww dear Grimalkin, our witch praises us loudly for catching spiders in the house. since humans prefer their meat cooked, maybe next time put your prey on the stove for her.Alternately, you could eat it yourself! We are quite proud of your slaying the gopher. Purrs from Rose Marie, Patrick, Hyacinth, Dandelion, Earl of Sixth Avenue, Peppermint, Mugwort, Lilac, CloudPaw, Wisteria and Earl Jr. of Comfrey Cottages xxx

  5. Good job, Grimalkin!! Human tastes are slightly different form kity's, but it was nice of you to offer and brave of you to catch it!!