Wednesday, April 27, 2011

Creature of Earth

I am a creature of earth and, as such, I definitely know where I should be doing my business!
It seems my witch has “other ideas”. She actually scolded me the other day for digging a hole in the earth around one of the larger plants she keeps captive in the house!
There I was, in mid-stream no less, when she plucked me up, carted me into the bathroom, and planted my butt in a plastic box full of sand!
Of course, I immediately jumped out, gave her the Look she deserved, and stalked off.

Friday, April 22, 2011

Divinity has its Price

My witch hates me!
Every familiar-in-training knows that a bell rung announces Sacred Time.
However, a few days ago (after a particularly good hunt, I might add) my witch decided to install a bell around my neck!
Now, as a cat, I’m full aware that my lineage goes straight back to many feline gods….. But must we announce Sacred Time with every step I take?
It’s most annoying – on top of which, the bell alerts every bird in the area of my presence.
My witch has clearly taken leave of her senses and I will make my displeasure known… right after supper.


I must admit I’ve grown rather attached to this bell on my collar. It resonates with a delicate musical ting-a-ling as I trot about and the other, inferior creatures definitely take notice whenever I pass by.
It came off today and I found myself desperate to have it back on. My witch found me rubbing my face and neck on the collar that lay on the floor, trying to re-attach the bauble myself.
She took pity on me and I sat very still as she re-fastened it about my neck.
I have realized that the bell must be a Magical Talisman that my witch has granted me. I will never lose it again!

Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Flying Lessons

The older and slower cats have informed me that witches don’t really fly on their brooms. I know for a fact they are mistaken because my witch has undertaken to show me how it’s done.
My first lesson took place rather unexpectedly this morning when I was playing in the fireplace. (If you’ve never tried this, you’ll find its great fun to get in there and fling the ashes out.)
At any rate, I was enjoying this activity when my witch suddenly appeared with her broom in her hand. She placed the bristle end alongside my bottom and the next thing I knew I was airborne and actually flying!
Unfortunately, I didn’t get very far – but, after all, it was only my first lesson.
I’ve practiced a few times since then by standing next to the broom and, once, even experimented with sitting on it. So far, I can’t seem to achieve lift-off without my witch’s assistance. However, one day I’ll have mastered this skill and then won’t the older and slower cats be jealous!

Monday, April 18, 2011

Sacred Time

Last night I watched as my witch performed a Magic Ritual. It involved going around in a circle several times - rather like chasing one’s tail.
She did a number of other things I didn’t understand and then she rang a large brass bell. I figured it was time to start asking questions so I asked what the bell was for.
She said it was to announce Sacred Time.
This morning, I’d forgotten all about it and was playing in the garden when my witch called me for breakfast. I immediately stopped stalking the strange bug that was crawling through the leaves and came galloping into the cottage.
As I skidded into the kitchen, I realized that I was the first one there. The older and slower cats had not arrived yet!
Then I noticed the large bell hanging on the wall. Well, Mealtime, in my opinion, is certainly sacred!
So, as my witch dished up our bowls, I helped her out by leaping onto the counter and smacked the bell with my tail. It rang loudly, startling my witch so much that she accidentally dropped one of the bowls.
Sure enough, the older and slower cats were instantly summoned.
Magical Lesson for the Day - Sacred Time is whenever you want it to be.

Sunday, April 10, 2011

Dragon Slayer

Today I killed a terrible dragon! It was a duel to the death, but I won!
Afterward, I was so proud that I dragged its giant carcass into the castle to show my witch and the older, slower cats.
My witch called the dragon a baby lizard and did not seem pleased. Shows how much SHE knows. However, I’ll forgive her and continue to slay dragons so the garden is safe for her to play in.

Saturday, April 9, 2011

Patience & Concentration

Today I learned two important magical lessons – Patience & Concentration.
It began when I was practicing my hunting skills on an exceptionally large black and yellow striped beetle. The thing was huge - bigger than my whole paw!
Once I’d captured it, I carried it into the cottage to see if perhaps I could entice the older and slower cats into a game. However, they were all busy meditating, so I deposited the beetle on the kitchen floor and played with it by myself for a while.
I was having a wonderful time when, suddenly, the silly thing crawled under the stove! No matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t reach it and the beetle refused to come out so we could continue our game.
What I needed was some magic … and then I remembered my witch’s lecture in the herb room yesterday about how magic requires concentration and patience. So I hunkered down, my nose a few inches from the front of the stove, and concentrated with all my might on the beetle reappearing.
It took a long time, but finally my patience was rewarded!
My witch entered the kitchen and noticed my concentration. “Poor Grimalkin,” she said, “Did you lose your toy under the stove?” (You can see by this that witches really do have remarkable psychic powers!)
I meowed that I had and she fetched her broom (a very magical tool, I am told…) and poked the handle into the small opening under the stove. She then used a sweeping motion with the broom handle and, within moments, the beetle had been magically summoned and reappeared before me. Concentration and Patience had indeed worked magic!
My mistress pretended surprise at seeing my “toy” was a beetle. She carried it back outside.
Normally I would have protested, but in this case I was too pleased with the results of my Magic to complain.

Friday, April 8, 2011

Water Element

The older cats refused to play with me today so I climbed up to visit the bird that my witch keeps in a cage hanging in her bedroom. The cage came crashing down bringing me and the bird with it! My witch was mad and shot me with a squirt bottle filled with water. Psyche, the feline matriarch, spanked me on the butt with her paw as I ran from the scene!
After that, I needed a nice meditation to calm myself, so I went out and perched on the rocks that border the fish pond. However, as any normal kitten would be, I was distracted by the fish swimming around. Fascinating creatures! I climbed out onto a further rock to get a better look.
The next thing I knew, both the rock and I were in the water and the fish were looking back at me!
My witch pulled me out of the pond and this time she was laughing. I think the fish were laughing too. Let me tell you, being soaked from whiskers to tail is NOT funny! I left very quickly and with as much dignity as I could, hopping and shaking my hind paws with every step.

Magical Lesson for the Day: My witch says there are 4 magical elements. I have decided that Water is not my favorite!


My witch has suggested that it would be beneficial to my studies if I kept a journal of my lessons and progress as a Familiar-in-Training. Since I’m determined to excel in my future career, I have decided to heed her advice. Besides, I am sure other kittens newly joining the ranks of pagan households will, no doubt, benefit from my experiences and acquired wisdom!
I shall begin by introducing myself:
My name is Grimalkin – an archaic term meaning “Grey Cat” (which I am) and, in the past, was often used to describe a witch’s familiar (which I will be someday). Not very imaginative, perhaps, but definitely appropriate. In fact, I’m rather proud of my name!
I was rescued from the side of a lonely country road where I’d been dumped in a box along with my siblings.
Recognizing at once my superior intelligence (and, perhaps, also attracted by my excellent markings and immaculate little white paws) the witch who discovered us decided to keep me and undertake my training. Suitable, less interesting homes were found for my siblings.
My new residence, an old house surrounded by tall trees and a large garden, is shared with 3 other cats, all much older and slower than I. There are also 2 dogs - who knows Why??? – but they are easily talked into a game of tag or wrestling and thus much more fun than the older and slower cats who spend most of their time sleeping!
There is also a snake with whom I hold long conversations and a bird that often rides on my witch’s shoulder. The bird would be fun to play with, but for some reason my mistress forbids it and becomes quite angry when I attempt to liberate the poor thing from its cage. (The silly bird does not appreciate my efforts on its behalf either!)
So, that is our household. Enough about them and on to MY adventures! I’m sure I will have many to record in the days to follow…